There will always be an end to the night

The whispers (part 2)

It was this warm, inexpressible feeling of completeness which was running through her veins in that moment.

That feeling released her smile. Not one of her polite smiles, neither one of her superficial, fake smiles.

It was one of those smiles that could light up a whole life in the moment it reached her lips.

She had not forgot him even though she was sure that he had forgotten her already.

But that did not matter.

She had felt his gaze onto her back while she has looked to the picture of the death goddess.

In that moment she could be certain that he knew her. Maybe he did not notice why it was like that.

She did not show him her mask that she used to hide her feeling behind.

No, she was just herself. Something that did not happen often.

He was the quiet one like he was it on that day.
It was not because he was shy, she guessed, because he simply was not shy. Maybe he was just wary or something like that.

She was not. Not really. Not of him.

When she was mistrustful of anyone, then of her family, especially of Nomen.

In her whole personalty she was not like him, she thought.
He was like the nightsky, in some ways. She knew that since the day they first met.

It was not just his dark hairs in combination with his blue eyes, it was the way he acted, he spokes.

But that was not the whole thing. She was sure that he was like the dark.

But not like the obscurity in that room she used to hate or like the eclipse around the goddess when their parents forced her to go there.
He was different.
She could not describe that in words.
Words were to weak. To cheap.

They talked about the light. 

He seemed to be not surprised because she could see it too. He dealt with it like it was usual to meet someone who could see the like often but she believed he was surprised.

Although she was not surprised by the fact that he seemed to hate it too.

Each of them showed that hate in another ways, she transformed it into light and he transformed it into darkness. It was their way to handle it.

Because that gift was a burden, too and not a lightly one.

He seemed to take his burden as a particularly heavy one and she knew he had the rights to do so.

She wanted to help him but it was not that easily. Not really.

They stood on different sites. For their countries sakes.

She knew a lot about him on that peace-conference-day. He did not know a thing about her but she knew nearly everything, because this young man was just the biggest enemy of her family.

The protector of the last crystal. The crystal her family wished to have.

This was the cause of the coming war. Just this stone.

Sometimes she hated it that much. To be in that position.

He really did not memories her but she tried to take it not to her heart.
Maybe it was not his fault at all. She did not know that so how could she judge about it?
He asked for her name and she recognized a little, hidden smile on his face.

She was happy about it in some ways, too happy and that was the reason for her to say goodbye.

It wouldn't be good to stay there but after she took a few steps, she had to turn back to him.

The smile on her lips awoke anew, while she told him that she was glad to had got the chance to talk to him. His answer made her laugh in a soft way before she offered him to come to her homeland one day although she knew he would never do so. He could not except he wanted to be killed.
But she had to say it.

Because she wished that they could see each other again.
She hoped for it like she hoped for the peace and no one would ever grant her these wishes.
The one of being with him was simply forbidden. It could not be.
Her family would not want that. They would not allow it in any ways. Never.
The other one was an unattainable wish too. Her clan planed the war for over four years now.
All their visits to those conference was a strategic play for them.
And she was just a puppet.
The doll of her family.
Maybe a shooting star.
No, it could not be like that! There was another way!
She would never accept her destiny like that.
She was not born to become a war-bringing monster at all.
The whispers kept on cheering her up, giving her hope, but they could not stop it.
They could not make it undone what just happened.
What had happened this long time ago on that day in the meadows.
They could not make her forget him. But that was never one of the things they wanted.
They wanted to give her hope but they could not stop the feeling of incompleteness rising in her heart. 
Again she felt alone.
Again she felt imperfect.